the colonel wants you to eat your vegetables

So...herbivores. Funny lot, they. In the absence of meat, they eat a lot of really unhealthy shit to get their proteins. They also tend to eat a lot of salad. That's just sad.

Salad isn't even food. Salad is what FOOD EATS.

As I'm sure you can imagine, I feel awfully bad for my vegetarian friends and the harm they're doing their bodies by denying them the proper proteins that millions of years of evolution demanded.

Fear not, vegematarians! I think I found a loophole in all of this meat-is-murder bollocks: KFC. That's right, KFC. As the urban legend goes, KFC no longer serves chicken. What they actually serve is an abomination of science - a throbbing bit of muscle with no brain that's kept alive through a heavy dose of hormones. (Side note: etymologically, "cock" is suddenly much more descriptive.)

Cool, right? I mean the bit about KFC not actually serving you a real animal. It's just a lab experiment, a happy, happy lab experiment. Sure, it's not any closer to a healthy diet than being an herbivore, but it's certainly better tasting that the other fake chicken products you probably have in the fridge at home.

So there you go,vegetarians. Get out your flags and stick em in the lawn of your nearest KFC. Claim that space for your kingdom. Enjoy your Kentucky fried awesome.

happy belated drunken day

So we had our wine tasting today instead of last week. We had a plan to a work out some big last minute wedding plans. But it didnt work oit that way. Instead, we jus drank too much and ate some good food, I made pierna fritas coconut rice, and mesclun salad. It roughly approximates the meal we intend to have at the wedding, so we ate, heartily. While drinking,

(heartily)

This is a bad post. I thin I'm drunk. Yeah, I'm drunk. So...success!!!

We picked our wines.

something wedded this way comes

Well the wedding is now less than four weeks out and there's still much to be done. Tomorrow night Tracy and I are doing a wine tasting to help us decide what wines to serve. Should be a good old fashioned drunk fest. Just what the doctor ordered on a thursday night. Yeehaw.

errors with our gift registry

I just went back through our gift registry for the wedding. There are no angle grinders, welders, engine hoists or car parts on it anywhere. Something is amiss.

honeymoonlighting

The honeymoon is officially booked!

Tracy and I are headed to the Riviera Maya, about an hour south of Cancun. We went the all-inclusive resort direction hoping we'd be able to relax and enjoy each other's company rather than fretting about where we're off to next. We've planned a few small day excursions...Scuba Diving (didn't think Tracy'd be up for that one), a trip to the ruins, and a visit to a wildlife park.

We're pretty excited. Tracy, for the most part, is interested in the swim-up bar.

It's pretty obvious why I love her.